Fruity Fun

“You can’t marry her!” Mr B shouted out angrily. His suit was a perfect yellow, and his hair was a nice brown.

“She’s a...a...” Mrs B stammered.

“Say it mom!” Bart screamed. His own suit was yellow, like his fathers. “Say what she is mother!”

“She’s a...” His mother’s voice trailed off.

“I’m an APPLE! And I am NOT ashamed to admit it! I love your son even if he IS a banana! If my family can accept it, why can’t you?”

“Shut up!” Mr B shouted, his skin flushing brown with his anger. “You have no right to talk you fat little red head!”

“No YOU shut up Mr B! I may not be tall or yellow but what does it matter? You know what YOU are Mr B?” Abby, the red apple drew herself up. “You, Mr B are a FRUITEST! You can’t stand anyone who isn’t a banana!”

A collective gasp rose from the crowd.

“How DARE you!” Mrs B cried.

“Oh stop with those crocodile tears mother-in-law! It’s true! Both for him, AND for you. How dare I? How dare YOU!”

Bart hugged his little Abby apple close. “Mother, father I AM sorry. I love Abby no matter how short or round or red she is.”

Mrs B fainted.

“So...” The Strawberry Minster asked. “You may now kiss the bride.”

Bart and Abby lived happily ever after with their several children, who were pears.


End


“Oh my God have you like, seen them?” Said Brianna. She was as plump and purple-blue as all the other cheerleaders on the squad.

“Ew yeah. I can not BELIEVE they wanted to join OUR cheerleading squad! I mean like hello.
They’re from stupid Cherry-Ville and we’re all blueberries. They have no place with us!” Brittany said in her snotty rich-girl voice. “And like Cherry-Ville? More like LOSER-ville. They’re all attached at the STEMS!”

“Oh my Gosh I know! Isn’t it like soo freakishly weird?” Brianna shook herself. “They couldn’t cheer if they wanted to, being all attached like that.”

Carrie and Christie Cherry stood around the corner, listening in on the blueberries convesation. Christie turned to run away, but Carrie ran ahead! They both yelped as their stem was pulled and they smashed into one another.

Brianna, Brandy and Brittany peeked around the corner and began laughing at the cherries who were still attached. “Oh. My. God! You two are like SUCH losers!” Brandy squealed.

“Oh shut up Brandy! You’re as fat and ugly as one of those human animals...what are they...? Pigs! You’re as fat and ugly as a pig and you got even less brains than one!” Carrie shouted out.
All the other girls, including Christie gasped.

“And you know what? I hope one day you’re down in your Blueberry patch and some human kid spots you and gobbles your fat little piggy body right up Brandy!”

“If she’s so stupid then why did you just make a run on sentence?” Brittany chirped.

Carrie shook her head, causing Christie to shake hers as well. “Shut up you bruised looking blueberry. You guys look like people skin that’s been hit too hard!”

“Oh my gosh. You are like SUCH a fruitest!” Brianna gasped.

“I’M A FRUITEST? Have you LOOKED in a mirror?” Carrie cried.

“Hey! Guys watch out!” Olivia, an orange from the eleventh grade called to the group of bickering fruit girls.

“Stay out of this Olivia!” The blueberries shouted at the same time.

“No seriously watch - ... out ...” She trailed off, as her boyfriend Oscar finished his tumble down the stairs and rolled over Brandy.

“...”

“Karma.”

The End

“Daddy what’s it mean when you like a fruit of the same gender?” Peter asked his father, who was sitting at the kitchen table.

Peter’s dad was an old Pear, his yellow-green skin bearing many brown age spots. He lowered the newspaper slowly, and stared at his son. “It mean’s nothin’ cause things like that don’t be happen’ around here.” Peter’s dad was foreign, and he always talked funny.

“Why?” Peter stared at his father, trying to understand.

“Because, you only like fruit of opposite gender.”

“Why?” Peter asked again.

“Because I say so.”

“Well why you say so? I mean, why DO you say so?”

“Because Strawberries tell us to say so.”

“Why?”

“Enough with the why Peter! No more why! Why you ask so much why, eh?” Peter’s father shouted at him.

“...Why not?” Peter asked quickly before scurrying as fast as he could out of the kitchen.

The next day at school Peter the Pear smashed into something tall and with odd spikey hair.

“Oof! I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. You’re a pear.”

“Yes. And you’re a pineapple.”

“I’m Phil.”

“I’m Peter.”

“I see...” Phil looked around nervously.

“You’re in grade...?”

“Oh, grade twelve.”

“So...you’re almost a grown up?”

“Yeah basically.”

“Oh! Okay. So what does it mean when you like someone of the same gender?” Peter asked happily.

“Uh...maybe you should...go ask your...uh...dad or something...”

“Why?”


The End

Tina the Tangerine screamed at the top of her lungs as she went toppling down the side of the hill. The person that had been about to peel her skin, had dropped her thankfully. But then his kitten got ahold of her.

It’s name was Tiger and to Tina that name fit it perfectly.

She prayed to Tree that Tiger wouldn’t catch her as she rolled faster and faster down that steep steep hill. Finally, she came to a stop in a park where a half rotten apple sat!

Poor Tina didn’t know what was scarier, the apple or Tiger who was right behind her!

“Quick!” The rotten apple shouted, “Move out of the way!”

Tina decided to trust the rotten fruit and managed to dodge to the side, just as Tiger pounced.
“Back! Back I say!” The rotten apple shouted at Tiger, waving a lollypop at the beast. The lollypop was covered in sand and a few cotton balls, but to Tina it looked like a shining sword.

Tiger backed up slowly, confused with the stinky apple that was waving a stinky sticky stick in his face. With a meow, the kitten turned and ran back up the hill to where his family was having a picnic.

“Oh thank you Mister Rotten Apple!”

“Uhm...My name is Adam.”

“...Oh.”

The End